“An Urban Legend That Affects Me.”
Multiple urban legends that affect me are carnivorous rabbits, super intelligent squirrels, and monkeys with lighters. These are not the everyday ordinary urban legends. These are my own worst paranoid fears and dreams. That’s what makes them so urban. The reason they are legends because I say so. They are my ideal fears and dreams after all. How cool would it be to have a rabbit that eats dolphin flesh? Also, a squirrel that can respond to orders and lob the occasional hand grenade would be freaking sweet! Though, a monkey with a lighter may not be as cool as they can still burn pants and their fur…toasted monkey. All in all, the man with the radioactive rubber pants will rule these legends.
>> It might help if I knew what urban meant. Oh well, I was lazy and didn’t feel like looking it up. Besides, if I did then we wouldn’t have this way cool journal. Ok, it isn’t that cool, but I still like it. Though, monkeys didn’t get a cool advantage because I really don’t like them…wait, that’s chimpanzees, still their ugly little buggers. Does anyone know where I can find radioactive rubber pants, preferably in a size that fits? Also, the non-killing radioactive ness would be good.
Apr 29, 2005
World Domination Is So Easy
“If I Ever Had The Chance, I’d…”
If I ever had the chance, I’d take over the world. It would be easy because I already have a plan to take over the world and I have a rough idea how I would rule. The window of opportunity is wide open, people just have to figure out it’s not knocking at the door and in fact the door is locked. Also, it would help if they could even come close to the door in the house of intelligence. Luckily, I have blueprints laid out on how to get there. Soon, the chance of six billion lifetimes will be mine; I will take full advantage of it.
>> Literally, I have made a plan to take over the world. My friends can vouch for this fact. In fact, two of my readers can (of course, my only readers) testify. It was a speech I made for Academic Decathlon that was much to obvious, but that’s why it’s going to work. Someday, you can say “Hey! I read that guy’s journals when he was in high school!” Heck, with my readers, they can say they’ve met me AND they read my journals. I was told not to change a word to my speech, but I had to, I was missing some and it is hard to complete a plan when it makes no sense. I have the exact same problem with these journals; it’s very hard to retype them when a sentence is missing a preposition or two.
If I ever had the chance, I’d take over the world. It would be easy because I already have a plan to take over the world and I have a rough idea how I would rule. The window of opportunity is wide open, people just have to figure out it’s not knocking at the door and in fact the door is locked. Also, it would help if they could even come close to the door in the house of intelligence. Luckily, I have blueprints laid out on how to get there. Soon, the chance of six billion lifetimes will be mine; I will take full advantage of it.
>> Literally, I have made a plan to take over the world. My friends can vouch for this fact. In fact, two of my readers can (of course, my only readers) testify. It was a speech I made for Academic Decathlon that was much to obvious, but that’s why it’s going to work. Someday, you can say “Hey! I read that guy’s journals when he was in high school!” Heck, with my readers, they can say they’ve met me AND they read my journals. I was told not to change a word to my speech, but I had to, I was missing some and it is hard to complete a plan when it makes no sense. I have the exact same problem with these journals; it’s very hard to retype them when a sentence is missing a preposition or two.
Apr 28, 2005
I Am Such A Loser
“A Curious Dream”
It all started as a video game. I had played the game before and knew exactly where I was. For some reason, I pulled out a Desert Eagle .357 and started shooting an alien much too big for this wonderful pistol. I soon remembered (subconsciously and consciously) and pulled out an organic weapon called the spore launcher. Four shots, same as the game, and the alien blew into oblivion. I walked on through sewers (yes, same as the game) and eventually came upon a large, organic room. Different aliens started popping out and I subsequently shot them with a submachine gun. I called the aliens the ant-people…they didn’t look like ants. Somewhere along the line I started swimming with salt-water fish. That’s about all I remember from my dream.
>> If you are wondering what the game was it’s called Half-Life: Opposing Force. Of course that means nothing to my grand total of two readers. Actually, for a dream, this is pretty good because I never remember my dreams, I know I had one, but not what it was about. Also, everything was still pixilated like in a game, which is sad because it means I have nothing to do with my time but play video games and perform entertainment for my friends. In case you are wondering as well, the Desert Eagle is a powerful pistol and kills most things in the game with only two shots, one for the small things, but that’s a waste. The ant-people and fish…I don’t know what’s up with that, I have no desire to meet an alien race that looks nothing like their name and want to kill me. The fish on the other hand…I’m a little worried about them.
It all started as a video game. I had played the game before and knew exactly where I was. For some reason, I pulled out a Desert Eagle .357 and started shooting an alien much too big for this wonderful pistol. I soon remembered (subconsciously and consciously) and pulled out an organic weapon called the spore launcher. Four shots, same as the game, and the alien blew into oblivion. I walked on through sewers (yes, same as the game) and eventually came upon a large, organic room. Different aliens started popping out and I subsequently shot them with a submachine gun. I called the aliens the ant-people…they didn’t look like ants. Somewhere along the line I started swimming with salt-water fish. That’s about all I remember from my dream.
>> If you are wondering what the game was it’s called Half-Life: Opposing Force. Of course that means nothing to my grand total of two readers. Actually, for a dream, this is pretty good because I never remember my dreams, I know I had one, but not what it was about. Also, everything was still pixilated like in a game, which is sad because it means I have nothing to do with my time but play video games and perform entertainment for my friends. In case you are wondering as well, the Desert Eagle is a powerful pistol and kills most things in the game with only two shots, one for the small things, but that’s a waste. The ant-people and fish…I don’t know what’s up with that, I have no desire to meet an alien race that looks nothing like their name and want to kill me. The fish on the other hand…I’m a little worried about them.
The Voice Strikes Back
“How I Make Decisions”
First, I think about it for a certain amount of seconds. From zero to however long (what? Zero is an amount) is how long I think about something. Then, I do something, or nothing and see how it turns out. How I get there is beyond me and why I did it is also completely confusing in it self. If you look back at “What Influences Me Most” you’ll see that a nice, little voice helps me out. Well, this voice isn’t stupid and seems to know answers to a lot of things.
>> Return of the Voice! Seriously, I don’t know how and why I do the things I do half the time, if I did then I would know the answer to life, the universe, and everything. Well, if you’re really curious, sorry for the inconvenience.
First, I think about it for a certain amount of seconds. From zero to however long (what? Zero is an amount) is how long I think about something. Then, I do something, or nothing and see how it turns out. How I get there is beyond me and why I did it is also completely confusing in it self. If you look back at “What Influences Me Most” you’ll see that a nice, little voice helps me out. Well, this voice isn’t stupid and seems to know answers to a lot of things.
>> Return of the Voice! Seriously, I don’t know how and why I do the things I do half the time, if I did then I would know the answer to life, the universe, and everything. Well, if you’re really curious, sorry for the inconvenience.
Apr 27, 2005
I'm Sorry, I Can't Hear You Over My Obnoxiously Loud Music
“That Would Be Fun”
I’m sure that would be fun. Though, it would be nice if I knew what it is that would be fun. I seem to never know what is going on or what people mean. They seem to never be clear or logical about anything. People don’t seem to realize they need to be specific on things they say. Again, it may seem fun, but who is to say how I’m going react and think about it when I don’t know what’s going on anyway.
>> This is a prime example of me over thinking on something. Though, in defense of other people, I zone out a lot. I can just be……………………shiny!……………
I’m sure that would be fun. Though, it would be nice if I knew what it is that would be fun. I seem to never know what is going on or what people mean. They seem to never be clear or logical about anything. People don’t seem to realize they need to be specific on things they say. Again, it may seem fun, but who is to say how I’m going react and think about it when I don’t know what’s going on anyway.
>> This is a prime example of me over thinking on something. Though, in defense of other people, I zone out a lot. I can just be……………………shiny!……………
When You Think You've Caught Up, You're Still Behind Because Others Moved On
“The Less Brilliant Moments Of My Life”
I have never had a ‘less brilliant’ moment in my life. I had the exact same I.Q. as before the incident and afterwards. I just chose not to use my I.Q. to its full extent. I am always brilliant, always have been, always will be. I can grow more in experience by learning, but I can’t grow stupider or gain knowledge from something I did. It will be an experience, but that’s the point. Therefore, I have never had a ‘less brilliant’ moment in my life.
>> I’m sure this was supposed to be about a point in my life where I did something that was considered to be stupid. Well, it wasn’t specific enough and I messed up the system. There seem to be only misunderstandings or just lack of knowledge, how can it be “stupid” if they didn’t even know in the first place? Just help these obviously, oblivious people, they will never learn if you just call them “stupid.” Of course, I slip on this, I can get over it though, but these people’s lives rest on you, and can you live with that? I can, I’m just weird like that.
I have never had a ‘less brilliant’ moment in my life. I had the exact same I.Q. as before the incident and afterwards. I just chose not to use my I.Q. to its full extent. I am always brilliant, always have been, always will be. I can grow more in experience by learning, but I can’t grow stupider or gain knowledge from something I did. It will be an experience, but that’s the point. Therefore, I have never had a ‘less brilliant’ moment in my life.
>> I’m sure this was supposed to be about a point in my life where I did something that was considered to be stupid. Well, it wasn’t specific enough and I messed up the system. There seem to be only misunderstandings or just lack of knowledge, how can it be “stupid” if they didn’t even know in the first place? Just help these obviously, oblivious people, they will never learn if you just call them “stupid.” Of course, I slip on this, I can get over it though, but these people’s lives rest on you, and can you live with that? I can, I’m just weird like that.
Apr 26, 2005
I Am Not A Cobra, I Swear
“If I Could Have a ‘Do-Over’ I’d…”
If I had a ‘do-over’ I would beat in a lot of people’s faces. Many times I have felt too passive about something. I’m pretty sure if I did something about an action someone did, I would feel better. Though, many times it would include just straight up punching a guy in the face. I should probably work on saying something then letting them make the first move. If I don’t, I would seem like a bad guy more than a good guy. I’d be like Cobra instead of G.I. Joe, except I don’t have a plan to take over the world…wait…yes I do. This is perplexing.
>> There are a lot of idiots in my grade. So, in retrospect, just straight up punching a guy in my grade would be followed by lots of laughter at the misfortunate fool. They guys are also those who are tiny and act tough, you know the wannabe gangsters? It probably wouldn’t teach them a lesson, but it sure would make one feel great knowing you don’t have to deal with the much more stupidity that much longer.
If I had a ‘do-over’ I would beat in a lot of people’s faces. Many times I have felt too passive about something. I’m pretty sure if I did something about an action someone did, I would feel better. Though, many times it would include just straight up punching a guy in the face. I should probably work on saying something then letting them make the first move. If I don’t, I would seem like a bad guy more than a good guy. I’d be like Cobra instead of G.I. Joe, except I don’t have a plan to take over the world…wait…yes I do. This is perplexing.
>> There are a lot of idiots in my grade. So, in retrospect, just straight up punching a guy in my grade would be followed by lots of laughter at the misfortunate fool. They guys are also those who are tiny and act tough, you know the wannabe gangsters? It probably wouldn’t teach them a lesson, but it sure would make one feel great knowing you don’t have to deal with the much more stupidity that much longer.
If Happiness Comes Materials, Then Food Make You Happy, Food Keeps You Alive, Thus Happiness is Essential to Life
“Things That Make Me Happy”
Things that make me happy include cookies, music (my kind), video games, and friends. First, the cookies are pretty obvious…they’re freaking cookies. Second, music, along the lines of rock and alternative, whenever listened to I just sit and smile. Most people think I’m demented that way, but I what they think. I’m so happy because I don’t have to hear their mindless banter. Third, I’ve always like playing video games, they always appear t be a challenge and most are. Mostly, I like first-person-shooters and real time strategies. There’s just something about incinerating, shooting, throwing, nuking, running over, jumping, stabbing, toasting, zapping, decimating, crushing, smiting, and just watching all the above that you can never do in real life that is entertaining and sometimes hilarious. Fourth, my friends are always fun to be around, and when they’re happy, I tend to feel better as well. Surely, these things make me happy.
>> You may think my happiness comes in weird and wrong ways, but what are you going to do about it? Take away my adrenaline running, obnoxiously loud, “angry” music and my super sweet, challenging, non-realistic games? Thus, plummeting me to a point of perpetual sadness? If you ask me, you are messed up and should be dragged out the street and beaten with almighty, stale, smiting donuts!
Things that make me happy include cookies, music (my kind), video games, and friends. First, the cookies are pretty obvious…they’re freaking cookies. Second, music, along the lines of rock and alternative, whenever listened to I just sit and smile. Most people think I’m demented that way, but I what they think. I’m so happy because I don’t have to hear their mindless banter. Third, I’ve always like playing video games, they always appear t be a challenge and most are. Mostly, I like first-person-shooters and real time strategies. There’s just something about incinerating, shooting, throwing, nuking, running over, jumping, stabbing, toasting, zapping, decimating, crushing, smiting, and just watching all the above that you can never do in real life that is entertaining and sometimes hilarious. Fourth, my friends are always fun to be around, and when they’re happy, I tend to feel better as well. Surely, these things make me happy.
>> You may think my happiness comes in weird and wrong ways, but what are you going to do about it? Take away my adrenaline running, obnoxiously loud, “angry” music and my super sweet, challenging, non-realistic games? Thus, plummeting me to a point of perpetual sadness? If you ask me, you are messed up and should be dragged out the street and beaten with almighty, stale, smiting donuts!
Apr 23, 2005
So, I'm Going To Die
“If I Had Three Days to Live”
If I had three days to live I don’t know what I would do. I probably wouldn’t even know it’s coming and just end up living my life normally. If I tried anything out of the norm (>>normal for myself, which in comparison to most people is weird) then that would probably be the cause of my death. For all I know the three days could be after I turn 101 years old. So, I’ll just live my life because I didn’t then it wouldn’t be my life and that would be a waste. In conclusion, I try not to dwell on such things, as I get lost time and time again.
>> The prompt I guess was supposed to imply that I knew that I was going to die, but I highly doubt that I would know that in real life. So, for all I know I could die tomorrow, but it doesn’t mean I should go and do adventurous, living on the edge, random crap because that will probably be the cause of my death. I think I do enough sweet, way out there stuff as it is. I’m crazy not stupid. Stupidity usually leads to major injuries and fatality. Craziness…well, that can just lead to bruises, but it only looks stupid enough to other people that you know you will mostly be the only person to try something so freaking awesome. Then again, I just might end up getting shot.
If I had three days to live I don’t know what I would do. I probably wouldn’t even know it’s coming and just end up living my life normally. If I tried anything out of the norm (>>normal for myself, which in comparison to most people is weird) then that would probably be the cause of my death. For all I know the three days could be after I turn 101 years old. So, I’ll just live my life because I didn’t then it wouldn’t be my life and that would be a waste. In conclusion, I try not to dwell on such things, as I get lost time and time again.
>> The prompt I guess was supposed to imply that I knew that I was going to die, but I highly doubt that I would know that in real life. So, for all I know I could die tomorrow, but it doesn’t mean I should go and do adventurous, living on the edge, random crap because that will probably be the cause of my death. I think I do enough sweet, way out there stuff as it is. I’m crazy not stupid. Stupidity usually leads to major injuries and fatality. Craziness…well, that can just lead to bruises, but it only looks stupid enough to other people that you know you will mostly be the only person to try something so freaking awesome. Then again, I just might end up getting shot.
Names of Pros and Cons
“The Advantages and Disadvantages of My Name.”
My name has few advantages and disadvantages. First, most people don’t even know my real name, which may or may not be an advantage depending how you look at it. Most people don’t know my name because I’m referred to as [DESTROYED BY SOME HIGH POWERED, UNDERGROUND ORGANIZATION OF SOME SORT] or [WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?], etc. One can only infer my real name is [IN FACT, I HAVE NO NAME]. Second, a disadvantage is people like to call me [YEAH…YOU GET THE POINT] because of stereotypes that people with that name are rich snobs. That is the biggest disadvantage, and monkey uranium poo, but countered by the biggest advantage and go by another name.
>> Literally, I have a billion names I can go by that have no real relevance to my actual name. Like Steve, or Roger, they have no real connection at all to my name. If I had a nickel for every nickname I can respond to I would have about…five dollars. Now if I had a nickel for every name I’ve been called, I own the people that called me the names and enough money left over to pay off the government for slavery.
My name has few advantages and disadvantages. First, most people don’t even know my real name, which may or may not be an advantage depending how you look at it. Most people don’t know my name because I’m referred to as [DESTROYED BY SOME HIGH POWERED, UNDERGROUND ORGANIZATION OF SOME SORT] or [WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING FOR?], etc. One can only infer my real name is [IN FACT, I HAVE NO NAME]. Second, a disadvantage is people like to call me [YEAH…YOU GET THE POINT] because of stereotypes that people with that name are rich snobs. That is the biggest disadvantage, and monkey uranium poo, but countered by the biggest advantage and go by another name.
>> Literally, I have a billion names I can go by that have no real relevance to my actual name. Like Steve, or Roger, they have no real connection at all to my name. If I had a nickel for every nickname I can respond to I would have about…five dollars. Now if I had a nickel for every name I’ve been called, I own the people that called me the names and enough money left over to pay off the government for slavery.
Apr 22, 2005
Lyrics! That Aren't Mine!
“I Want To Be…”
I want to be sedated. Twenty- twenty- twenty-four hours to go I want to be sedated. Nothing to do nowhere to go I want to be sedated. Just get me to the airport and put me in a plane. Hurry, hurry, hurry before I go insane, I can’t feel control my fingers, I can’t control my brain oh no oh ho. Twenty- twenty- twenty-four hours to go I want to be sedated. Nothing to do nowhere to go I want to be sedated. Just put me in a wheelchair and get me to the show. Hurry, hurry, hurry before I go loco, I can’t control my fingers, I can’t control my toes oh no oh ho. I wrote the lyrics of a song by The Ramones as close as I could. The name of the song is “I Wanna Be Sedated” but I could be a little off. I had to summarize the lyrics as best as I could though I still think it’s a pretty good song.
>> When I first saw this prompt, a thought came to the back of my head that said “Crap, I’m going to have to write about what I want to be and go into detail.” I didn’t feel like doing that, so I wrote the first thing that came to my head, “I want to be sedated.” For a while I thought “Minority” by Green Day would also work, but I didn’t know the lyrics well enough and it’s not very school appropriate (even though my teacher never really checks what we write). I hope this isn’t some kind of copyright infringement (whatever it’s called), it is not my own!! The words before the last three sentences were all written and sung by The Ramones!
I want to be sedated. Twenty- twenty- twenty-four hours to go I want to be sedated. Nothing to do nowhere to go I want to be sedated. Just get me to the airport and put me in a plane. Hurry, hurry, hurry before I go insane, I can’t feel control my fingers, I can’t control my brain oh no oh ho. Twenty- twenty- twenty-four hours to go I want to be sedated. Nothing to do nowhere to go I want to be sedated. Just put me in a wheelchair and get me to the show. Hurry, hurry, hurry before I go loco, I can’t control my fingers, I can’t control my toes oh no oh ho. I wrote the lyrics of a song by The Ramones as close as I could. The name of the song is “I Wanna Be Sedated” but I could be a little off. I had to summarize the lyrics as best as I could though I still think it’s a pretty good song.
>> When I first saw this prompt, a thought came to the back of my head that said “Crap, I’m going to have to write about what I want to be and go into detail.” I didn’t feel like doing that, so I wrote the first thing that came to my head, “I want to be sedated.” For a while I thought “Minority” by Green Day would also work, but I didn’t know the lyrics well enough and it’s not very school appropriate (even though my teacher never really checks what we write). I hope this isn’t some kind of copyright infringement (whatever it’s called), it is not my own!! The words before the last three sentences were all written and sung by The Ramones!
Gorilla Slinky
“Right or Popular?”
If I had a choice to do it right or popular, I would choose to do it through my own analysis and thought process. Either way, popular is conformity, but if I chose right then that would be conformity still defined by the majority, just opposite. Of course, my choice may sometimes be “right”, or it might consist of having a drawing of gorillas with fully decked out with submachine pineapple guns. Also, my choice is always right, just not always at the proper time and place. If it were, I would be ruling the world right now with strategically placed snipers enforcing the law all over the world. They would shoot you with a range of slinkies to the homing bullet constructed in the pits of Brazil. This may not seem right, but who is to really say what is right? After all, this could be one of those times when I have chosen right, just not at the right place and time. Overall, the solution will probably end up being popular, stupid peer pressure and stupid people being the majority.
>> No one would suspect gorillas toting submachine guns that shoot pineapples. Also, what would you do if you suddenly got hit with a slinky from a far distance? Shoot back? It was a slinky!! I’m not sure if there are pits in Brazil, but one can only assume and hope.
If I had a choice to do it right or popular, I would choose to do it through my own analysis and thought process. Either way, popular is conformity, but if I chose right then that would be conformity still defined by the majority, just opposite. Of course, my choice may sometimes be “right”, or it might consist of having a drawing of gorillas with fully decked out with submachine pineapple guns. Also, my choice is always right, just not always at the proper time and place. If it were, I would be ruling the world right now with strategically placed snipers enforcing the law all over the world. They would shoot you with a range of slinkies to the homing bullet constructed in the pits of Brazil. This may not seem right, but who is to really say what is right? After all, this could be one of those times when I have chosen right, just not at the right place and time. Overall, the solution will probably end up being popular, stupid peer pressure and stupid people being the majority.
>> No one would suspect gorillas toting submachine guns that shoot pineapples. Also, what would you do if you suddenly got hit with a slinky from a far distance? Shoot back? It was a slinky!! I’m not sure if there are pits in Brazil, but one can only assume and hope.
Apr 21, 2005
I Know Nothing About What I Should Know
“How Do You Know What Love Really Is?”
I don’t know anything about love. If I did I bet I would go insane. My head would explode so fast that I wouldn’t know it. I would go into the head explosion but just look back a couple journals. Also, I will probably never know what love really is until I put enough effort to look in Webster’s Dictionary. Until then, I’ll just go through life hoping that people will like me for who I am. If they tried to change me then I wouldn’t be I and go crazy.
>> Note: Webster’s Dictionary doesn’t seem to help too much. Also, by “people” I mean if they were friends and they tried to change me. I am certainly interested in girls. Even if by some freakish chance a girl would like me enough, I probably mess up somehow knowing my lack of knowledge of girls. I’m most likely going to die alone.
I don’t know anything about love. If I did I bet I would go insane. My head would explode so fast that I wouldn’t know it. I would go into the head explosion but just look back a couple journals. Also, I will probably never know what love really is until I put enough effort to look in Webster’s Dictionary. Until then, I’ll just go through life hoping that people will like me for who I am. If they tried to change me then I wouldn’t be I and go crazy.
>> Note: Webster’s Dictionary doesn’t seem to help too much. Also, by “people” I mean if they were friends and they tried to change me. I am certainly interested in girls. Even if by some freakish chance a girl would like me enough, I probably mess up somehow knowing my lack of knowledge of girls. I’m most likely going to die alone.
What Event?
“How An Event Made Me A Different Person”
I can’t say I’ve had an event that changed me as a person. Maybe I’m not even a person at all; maybe I’m just a figment of everyone’s imagination. Also, you only think you’re reading this because people only say it exists. Though, I am real person and I’m pretty sure this is a real paper (>>journal entry) with real written word on it (>>typed, whatever). If it isn’t, my dreams, or nightmares, are really messed up. Furthermore, I am just writing stuff down because I can’t think of anything to write about the actual topic.
>> Mass hallucination. That would suck if I woke up and this was a dream…my world just got that much smaller. I’ll try not worry about such things as it makes one feel miniscule and insignificant.
I can’t say I’ve had an event that changed me as a person. Maybe I’m not even a person at all; maybe I’m just a figment of everyone’s imagination. Also, you only think you’re reading this because people only say it exists. Though, I am real person and I’m pretty sure this is a real paper (>>journal entry) with real written word on it (>>typed, whatever). If it isn’t, my dreams, or nightmares, are really messed up. Furthermore, I am just writing stuff down because I can’t think of anything to write about the actual topic.
>> Mass hallucination. That would suck if I woke up and this was a dream…my world just got that much smaller. I’ll try not worry about such things as it makes one feel miniscule and insignificant.
Apr 20, 2005
If I Looked into the Future in the Present, then the Present soon Becomes the Past, thus the Future becomes the Past, but the Past is the Future?
“I Was There When…”
I was there when my head exploded. At least, I will be there when my head explodes. I hope I’ll be there when my head explodes because I’ll come back and say:
“Whoa! My head exploded!” Of course I’ll be a little distressed by the news and I’ll sit down. I would think about it, but of course my head exploded and I need it to think. Then again, I’ll probably fall down after I’ve made my discovery because I would be (of course) dead. In conclusion, I learned I wouldn’t want to die from a monkey with a rocket launcher.
>> This is the journal that started all of this, it gave me motivation to share with complete strangers (and some not so complete) like yourselves (provided anyone else is reading this). When I first saw the prompt on the board for this, I knew I would have to write about some event in my life, but I haven’t had a lot of exciting stuff happen to me. So, I wrote the first thing that came to my head. Obviously, the first thing that came to my head was my about my head, and since explosions are just cool I involved that. Personally, I think this is just hilarious to look back on because I don’t quite remember what my thought process was on this. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
I was there when my head exploded. At least, I will be there when my head explodes. I hope I’ll be there when my head explodes because I’ll come back and say:
“Whoa! My head exploded!” Of course I’ll be a little distressed by the news and I’ll sit down. I would think about it, but of course my head exploded and I need it to think. Then again, I’ll probably fall down after I’ve made my discovery because I would be (of course) dead. In conclusion, I learned I wouldn’t want to die from a monkey with a rocket launcher.
>> This is the journal that started all of this, it gave me motivation to share with complete strangers (and some not so complete) like yourselves (provided anyone else is reading this). When I first saw the prompt on the board for this, I knew I would have to write about some event in my life, but I haven’t had a lot of exciting stuff happen to me. So, I wrote the first thing that came to my head. Obviously, the first thing that came to my head was my about my head, and since explosions are just cool I involved that. Personally, I think this is just hilarious to look back on because I don’t quite remember what my thought process was on this. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.
There Are No Voices
“A Strong Influence In My Life”
I haven’t had many influences in my life. At least, no influences I can think of other than the voice in my head. It has always told me to be myself and let no one tell me who or what to be. I don’t know where it gets ideas, but they seem pretty good most of the time. I’m not crazy, only through the perception of the majority, superficial definition am I crazy. In my eyes, everyone else is stupid and needs to listen to their own voice more often. Maybe I created the voice, but what do I know about insanity, I’m perfectly fine.
>> The voice has told me all the answers to everything that I know; it has an organizational system that works instantaneously (usually). It tells me the answer and doesn’t tell me to do bad things, and I keep it there, we have a good system. About 90% percent of the time it has good ideas. At least, the ideas sound good at the time. Also, what I mean by “stupid” is that they just go with whatever everyone else is and not really thinking for themselves. Maybe the voice is just my mind for itself…maybe…what? Shut up? Ok, sounds good.
I haven’t had many influences in my life. At least, no influences I can think of other than the voice in my head. It has always told me to be myself and let no one tell me who or what to be. I don’t know where it gets ideas, but they seem pretty good most of the time. I’m not crazy, only through the perception of the majority, superficial definition am I crazy. In my eyes, everyone else is stupid and needs to listen to their own voice more often. Maybe I created the voice, but what do I know about insanity, I’m perfectly fine.
>> The voice has told me all the answers to everything that I know; it has an organizational system that works instantaneously (usually). It tells me the answer and doesn’t tell me to do bad things, and I keep it there, we have a good system. About 90% percent of the time it has good ideas. At least, the ideas sound good at the time. Also, what I mean by “stupid” is that they just go with whatever everyone else is and not really thinking for themselves. Maybe the voice is just my mind for itself…maybe…what? Shut up? Ok, sounds good.
Just Say You Never Met Me
“A Time I Was Scared”
There really isn’t a time when I’m not scared. I’m always paranoid about someone planning or doing something. I’m pretty sure everyone has something against me and want to do something to me about it. People may think I never look scared, but I’m watching making sure nothing suddenly flings out at me. Also, I make sure I’m ready for any sudden outbreaks of a person rampaging on me out of anger. Though, I may not be real strong and probably won’t win in a fight, I do have a lot of friends who will probably go berserk and do all the work for me.
>> I better work on the watching thing as I zone out a lot. I’m not afraid of too many people in my grade…it’s the others I may have to worry about. The only time I look really scared is when something disturbing has just happened or when suddenly it gets quiet and everyone is staring and smiling at me, but I have no idea what’s going on because I was zoned. Uh oh, I may saying too much here. *Runs to find a good hiding spot behind a rock*
There really isn’t a time when I’m not scared. I’m always paranoid about someone planning or doing something. I’m pretty sure everyone has something against me and want to do something to me about it. People may think I never look scared, but I’m watching making sure nothing suddenly flings out at me. Also, I make sure I’m ready for any sudden outbreaks of a person rampaging on me out of anger. Though, I may not be real strong and probably won’t win in a fight, I do have a lot of friends who will probably go berserk and do all the work for me.
>> I better work on the watching thing as I zone out a lot. I’m not afraid of too many people in my grade…it’s the others I may have to worry about. The only time I look really scared is when something disturbing has just happened or when suddenly it gets quiet and everyone is staring and smiling at me, but I have no idea what’s going on because I was zoned. Uh oh, I may saying too much here. *Runs to find a good hiding spot behind a rock*
Experimental Tubes
“An Experiment I Once Tried”
I once tried an experiment where I went down a really steep hill with lots of bumps, trees, and rope. I had an inner tube and a really long rope, they were tied together and the other end of the rope was tied to a tree. When this invention is applied to a steep and snowy hill, it produces an adrenaline feeling. At the end of the rope, the inner tube suddenly flings back and you continue to fly forward. So, after a few tries at this I decided to go down with a friend (We’ll call him Broccoli). We got in the tube side by side and went down the hill. We got the crap scared out of us mainly because one of us sunk and the other almost couldn’t stay on. Luckily, Broccoli held on to me so he didn’t fly off and in return I didn’t sink through the tube. In conclusion, we did it again, and again, and that’s about when we stopped.
Apr 18, 2005
I Could Redo Nothing
“If I could do that over, I’d…”
If I could redo something, I would have erased the prompt on the board that makes me write about something that I have no real answer to. If I did, then I wouldn’t be writing (>>typing) this now and would have never been stressed over what I would do over again. Though, if I did, then this would have never been written (>>typed) and you probably wouldn’t be reading this. Though, if I keep going it becomes quite the paradox and hurts to think about. So, I’ve come to the conclusion not dwell on the past too much and what I did or didn’t do.
>>If you can understand this journal all the more phenomenal, cosmic power to you. This is about the time when I really didn’t care about the journals so much so I just rambled on about nothing so I could fill in the space that was required of me. Strange, my teacher doesn’t check the journals, so in fact, I could write a journal about absolutely nothing about the prompt and he wouldn’t care. That’s me, finding the bare minimum to get good grades so it only looks like I’m real smart. I’m actually not; everyone else is just really stupid. In the world of the blind, the one eyed man rules all. Man, these journals keep looking shorter and shorter. I hope they get longer soon, but I’m just too lazy to turn the page and look. Well, look at that, I am good at rambling on about nothing.
If I could redo something, I would have erased the prompt on the board that makes me write about something that I have no real answer to. If I did, then I wouldn’t be writing (>>typing) this now and would have never been stressed over what I would do over again. Though, if I did, then this would have never been written (>>typed) and you probably wouldn’t be reading this. Though, if I keep going it becomes quite the paradox and hurts to think about. So, I’ve come to the conclusion not dwell on the past too much and what I did or didn’t do.
>>If you can understand this journal all the more phenomenal, cosmic power to you. This is about the time when I really didn’t care about the journals so much so I just rambled on about nothing so I could fill in the space that was required of me. Strange, my teacher doesn’t check the journals, so in fact, I could write a journal about absolutely nothing about the prompt and he wouldn’t care. That’s me, finding the bare minimum to get good grades so it only looks like I’m real smart. I’m actually not; everyone else is just really stupid. In the world of the blind, the one eyed man rules all. Man, these journals keep looking shorter and shorter. I hope they get longer soon, but I’m just too lazy to turn the page and look. Well, look at that, I am good at rambling on about nothing.
Not Found
“Things I Have Lost”
I have lost many things over my lifetime. The first thing I probably lost was my own sanity. Lots of people have said I’m crazy, psycho, and weird. Though, it doesn’t matter to me because they look just as crazy to me as I do to them. Then, somewhere along the line we got a dog. Which then led to me losing lots of many items to the jaws of one stupid dog. Next, I lost my favorite pet, Barney the rabbit, we weren’t sure how old he was, but he was before the dumb purple dinosaur. Those are probably the most important things that I have lost.
>> My rabbit was the most important. Yes, he was before the fat, oblivious dinosaur. As for my dog, I hate it; I could probably eat my dog and laugh at the same time. That may sound cruel and unusual, but then again why do you keep reading? I’m pretty sure I supposed to go into other things I have lost, but these seem like the most important ones. Yeah, that was a freaking awesome rabbit as you can see from my second journal.
I have lost many things over my lifetime. The first thing I probably lost was my own sanity. Lots of people have said I’m crazy, psycho, and weird. Though, it doesn’t matter to me because they look just as crazy to me as I do to them. Then, somewhere along the line we got a dog. Which then led to me losing lots of many items to the jaws of one stupid dog. Next, I lost my favorite pet, Barney the rabbit, we weren’t sure how old he was, but he was before the dumb purple dinosaur. Those are probably the most important things that I have lost.
>> My rabbit was the most important. Yes, he was before the fat, oblivious dinosaur. As for my dog, I hate it; I could probably eat my dog and laugh at the same time. That may sound cruel and unusual, but then again why do you keep reading? I’m pretty sure I supposed to go into other things I have lost, but these seem like the most important ones. Yeah, that was a freaking awesome rabbit as you can see from my second journal.
Rock On!
“My kind of Music”
My kind of music is not the kind of rap everyone else listens to. I like alternative rock and the occasional metal. It sounds better than everything else because its more than just talking really fast and making weird motions with your hands. Real instruments are played by the actual band members and not hired. Its fast music with well-applied lyrics (usually) and it takes great skill to play. Alternative rock is my kind of music because it actually is music. It has changed the world and will continue to do so as long as there is some bass-loving freak out there in the cold “rap” world.
>> Yes, I hate rap with a crimson fury. Heck, I can right a long poem and talk real fast to it and then hire someone to put a beat to it. Now, some of you might say “Well, *insert band name* has synthesizers, and the added this and that.” I don’t care, it doesn’t take away the fact they still have real instruments that are also being played. I have to give props to classic, jazz, country, and etc. because they actually do have people playing instruments (well, most do). So, basically, rap is the dirt that the ladder full of rungs stands on music-wise. I just prefer rock to the other types and if rap is only available, I will shoot myself.
My kind of music is not the kind of rap everyone else listens to. I like alternative rock and the occasional metal. It sounds better than everything else because its more than just talking really fast and making weird motions with your hands. Real instruments are played by the actual band members and not hired. Its fast music with well-applied lyrics (usually) and it takes great skill to play. Alternative rock is my kind of music because it actually is music. It has changed the world and will continue to do so as long as there is some bass-loving freak out there in the cold “rap” world.
>> Yes, I hate rap with a crimson fury. Heck, I can right a long poem and talk real fast to it and then hire someone to put a beat to it. Now, some of you might say “Well, *insert band name* has synthesizers, and the added this and that.” I don’t care, it doesn’t take away the fact they still have real instruments that are also being played. I have to give props to classic, jazz, country, and etc. because they actually do have people playing instruments (well, most do). So, basically, rap is the dirt that the ladder full of rungs stands on music-wise. I just prefer rock to the other types and if rap is only available, I will shoot myself.
Apr 17, 2005
Vacation
“The Best Place I’ve been on Vacation”
The best place I’ve been on vacation was when I went to Florida with my family. We flew in a large airliner to Ft. Worth and drove all the way to Key West. Once at Key West…>>wait…*reads through whole journal*…Amazing! This journal entry is horrendously boring. If your visual receptors haven’t fallen from their sockets and your brains melted through your nose, I wouldn’t blame you. Be glad I stopped the journal when I did. If you want more…you have problems. Though, I feel obligated to fill in this space now.
>>Well, I kind of got in a fight on April 15 (2005). The guy has problems and overreacts to stuff. He thought I said something about his sister, who is apparently very attractive, but I actually wouldn’t know because I have never seen her in my life. Well, anyway, he started swinging his bag full of not soft textbooks at me. Of course, these do not feel good to the touch when swung by someone twice your size and at high velocities. I then started kicking his bag away from my general direction. Then, I missed…at him…then he kicked me…I got really, really angry and lunged at the guy. I can only assume I lunged because he is taller than me and I remember his face being lower than my vision with my left fist hitting him in the face area. I’m not sure if my right hand made any contact at all, but I think it did because then he back knuckled me with his right hand right below the temple. I didn’t bleed, I didn’t cry, I didn’t crawl up in a ball and rock back and forth, I just stood there ready to go nuts again. He did too. Of course my face…temple…area didn’t feel good, but I try to control my pain when in moments of seriousness. Then, other people started yelling at him because he hit someone of lesser strength and size. I’m kind of angry with the guy, but not because he hit me, but because he assumed something about me that was wrong. He didn’t try to figure it out what actually happened and just went on a rampage. Now it’s going to be awhile for him to get over it because he holds grudges and doesn’t like to talk to the people he has problems with. Anger is a blind emotion.
The best place I’ve been on vacation was when I went to Florida with my family. We flew in a large airliner to Ft. Worth and drove all the way to Key West. Once at Key West…>>wait…*reads through whole journal*…Amazing! This journal entry is horrendously boring. If your visual receptors haven’t fallen from their sockets and your brains melted through your nose, I wouldn’t blame you. Be glad I stopped the journal when I did. If you want more…you have problems. Though, I feel obligated to fill in this space now.
>>Well, I kind of got in a fight on April 15 (2005). The guy has problems and overreacts to stuff. He thought I said something about his sister, who is apparently very attractive, but I actually wouldn’t know because I have never seen her in my life. Well, anyway, he started swinging his bag full of not soft textbooks at me. Of course, these do not feel good to the touch when swung by someone twice your size and at high velocities. I then started kicking his bag away from my general direction. Then, I missed…at him…then he kicked me…I got really, really angry and lunged at the guy. I can only assume I lunged because he is taller than me and I remember his face being lower than my vision with my left fist hitting him in the face area. I’m not sure if my right hand made any contact at all, but I think it did because then he back knuckled me with his right hand right below the temple. I didn’t bleed, I didn’t cry, I didn’t crawl up in a ball and rock back and forth, I just stood there ready to go nuts again. He did too. Of course my face…temple…area didn’t feel good, but I try to control my pain when in moments of seriousness. Then, other people started yelling at him because he hit someone of lesser strength and size. I’m kind of angry with the guy, but not because he hit me, but because he assumed something about me that was wrong. He didn’t try to figure it out what actually happened and just went on a rampage. Now it’s going to be awhile for him to get over it because he holds grudges and doesn’t like to talk to the people he has problems with. Anger is a blind emotion.
Apr 15, 2005
Fixing things in Charge
“If I were in charge, these are the things I’d fix.”
I would fix a lot of things in the world. First, I would solve stupidity. No one would be dumb in a “no-logic” way. Everything would be seen logically using common sense. Second, I would have genetically altered rabbits. They would be large in size and domestic. We would use them for transportation, as it’d be a soft ride. Also, we could, if necessary, use them for food. Another plus is once we have four we suddenly have thousands. Third, we will have organic weapons. We will literally grow defenses and will have infinite weaponry and ammunition. This will make violence illogical seeing how it will never end with unlimited weaponry. This is how I would “fix” things if I were in charge.
>>Notice that I would be in charge of the world. Also, you can see stupid, oblivious people annoy me and should be shot…err…taught. The rabbit’s idea came from my own rabbit, which died many years ago; he was a freaking sweet rabbit. The weapons idea came from Half-Life, yes, I have no real social life, and if I did then you wouldn’t be reading this. Yup, seems all-good to me.
I would fix a lot of things in the world. First, I would solve stupidity. No one would be dumb in a “no-logic” way. Everything would be seen logically using common sense. Second, I would have genetically altered rabbits. They would be large in size and domestic. We would use them for transportation, as it’d be a soft ride. Also, we could, if necessary, use them for food. Another plus is once we have four we suddenly have thousands. Third, we will have organic weapons. We will literally grow defenses and will have infinite weaponry and ammunition. This will make violence illogical seeing how it will never end with unlimited weaponry. This is how I would “fix” things if I were in charge.
>>Notice that I would be in charge of the world. Also, you can see stupid, oblivious people annoy me and should be shot…err…taught. The rabbit’s idea came from my own rabbit, which died many years ago; he was a freaking sweet rabbit. The weapons idea came from Half-Life, yes, I have no real social life, and if I did then you wouldn’t be reading this. Yup, seems all-good to me.
Opposite of the End
>>This blog is almost completely dedicated to my writing of journal entries. No, this is not like a diary. It's a class assignment I do everyday in a class called Grammar and Composition I and II. I (and all other students) come into class and read a one-line prompt on the chalkboard. We are to write anything that comes from this one-line prompt...anything! Typically, they are all cliche prompts, but I get tired of conformity and decide to be different. I write some weird, paradox, thinking that come from just thinking differently. I looked back at some and thought they were kind of funny. I post them here because I just want to share and hope you will enjoy it as much I do. I will write the prompt in quotations and then continue with my actual response to the prompt. Anything with a ">>" before it is not actually part of the journal, just some notes about it. All my journals are done on 81/2" by 11" paper with the whole punches in it. Here we go with the first ever.
“How I approach writing assignments.”
I’m supposed to be writing from red line to red line. All the way past the middle hole punch is how far I am supposed to go. Today, I have no real idea what I’m doing supposed to write and just fill in space with reminiscent rambling. I’m left handed so the lead will smear across my paper and make it look bad. I’d much rather type as I can’t really smear my paper. Also, I think I can type faster then I can actually write. Now I’m just bored and have no idea what to write about writing. There’s the middle hole punch, so I’m stopping now.
>>Hmmm…that appears shorter than it does on paper…oh well, I have another journal sometime soon…hopefully.
“How I approach writing assignments.”
I’m supposed to be writing from red line to red line. All the way past the middle hole punch is how far I am supposed to go. Today, I have no real idea what I’m doing supposed to write and just fill in space with reminiscent rambling. I’m left handed so the lead will smear across my paper and make it look bad. I’d much rather type as I can’t really smear my paper. Also, I think I can type faster then I can actually write. Now I’m just bored and have no idea what to write about writing. There’s the middle hole punch, so I’m stopping now.
>>Hmmm…that appears shorter than it does on paper…oh well, I have another journal sometime soon…hopefully.
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